93brand UFOmoplata Spats
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93brand UFOmoplata Spats

Item Details

    A wild new species of highly specialized submission creature, originally spotted in rural Arkansas, has been captured on film by an amateur UFO chaser just outside of Area 51.

    It's suspected that this extraterrestrial destroyer of limbs has been kept under wraps by the governments of the USA and Mexico for several years now, however it seems one creature has escaped and is en route to Long Beach, California. It's rumored that their life force achieves sustenance via severely dislocated shoulders and gold medallions.

    New York specialists at 93brand agency have come up with this colorful sketch to help catch the wicked beast. Based on an amateur photograph, it depicts the extraterrestrial as it executes the feared Flying Omoplata, which has recently terrorized mortal biped humanoids. Utilizing their tentacles and clawed abdomen, abduction and submission is done with minimal effort and maximum force. . . One might say it is the purest form of leverage ever witnessed.

    93brand's premium spats format includes a simple and effective compression cut, consisting of 82/18 poly/lycra panels that are secured with low-profile, ultra-strong flatlock stitching. The wide Jacquard band is nice and flexible while still hugging your waist to ensure a steady and secure hold. Smooth stretch fabric covers the interior and the upper edge of the waistband so that even if you put on a few pounds during the holidays, the softened upper edge will keep the spats from digging into your skin. Equipped with an internal drawstring for easy adjustment. The intricate artwork is, of course, fully sublimated.

    NOTE: The fit is not the same as 93 Brand's Standard Issue spats. These are a superior fabric, simpler panel cut (these run a little bigger than the S.I. model and are a more substantial/softer fabric) so please take a look at the size chart.

    Size Guide
    S: 130-145 lbs
    M: 145-165 lbs
    L: 165-187 lbs
    XL: 187-210 lbs
    2XL: 210-231 lbs

    93brand UFOmoplata Spats $17

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    Welcome to Part 3 of our year-end monster Rolling Deals Jamboree.
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    Round 3 and oh shawty you guessed it! Crabby and the boys just pulled up ready to run up that credit card debt for some more fresh deals. Looking out of #20 Aesthetic "tie dye" shorts gotta have it, GOTTA have it! Items are shipping fast folks! Already got my Scramble Okami shorts in the mail. Clock's ticking, DONT BE LATE! 😉

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